Grandma always said...

During tough times, I often think of what my mom, Aunt Kathy and grandma would say. Neither Grandma nor Aunt Kathy is with us anymore, but if I need a refresher, I can always give my mom or cousin Steph a call.

Below are a few of these classic sayings with my more modern interpretation. "Kind" and "gracious" are two words that come to mind when I think of these women. How my mother ended up with such crass daughters is beyond me.

The italics are my explanation for each adage.

Turn your sails. Stop obsessing about that thing you're obsessing about because you're wearing a groove into your brain.

Anger is like an acid that dissolves the container it's in. Stop swimming in the shit. You're just making yourself sick.

Resentment is like eating rat poison and expecting someone else to die. See above.

Anyone can have a normal mother. My neuroses are preparing you for the real world.

Put a good face on it. Play along and try to avoid doing or saying something you'll have to apologize for later. There's nothing worse than having to apologize to an arsehole.

Don't take it out of your hide. Stop beating yourself up.

Let sleeping dogs lie. For god's sake, why are you waking a sleeping baby to feed her?!

Only offer one excuse for opting out of something. If you have more than one, even if they're legitimate, you look like a liar. You have the right to NOT explain yourself. The less said the better.

Better to ask for forgiveness than permission. Just do it and deal later.

If you have nothing nice to say, then don't say anything at all. Shut up, bitch.

And that's where I'll end this.

What about you? What are the family sayings that pop into your head?